Two Quotes by Bill Cosby, an American actor, comedian, educator and activist. His greatest television success came with the debut of ‘The Cosby Show’ in 1984, which was unprecedented in its portrayal of a wealthy, educated African-American family.
“Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.”
“Old is always fifteen years from now.”
- Bill Cosby (1937- )
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Woody Allen is a three-time Academy Award winning film director, jazz musician and comedian. He has lived his entire life in New York City. Here are three quotes from his comic side.
“It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off.”
“Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.”
“What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.”
- Woody Allen (1935- )
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Robin Williams is an Academy award winning actor and comedian, best known for his wild improvisational skills and impersonations. He was voted ‘Most likely to not succeed’ in high school.
“When you create you get a little endorphin rush. Why do you think Einstein looked like that?”
- Robin Williams (1953- )
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An American professor of mythology and comparative religion, Joseph Campbell became widely popular when he collaborated with Bill Moyers in the PBS series, ‘The Power of Myth’.
“A computer is like an Old Testament god with a lot of rules and no mercy.”
- Joseph Campbell (1904-1987)
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Garrison Keillor, writer and host of ‘A Prairie Home Companion’, the live variety radio show modeled loosely after radio shows that were broadcast and listened to prior to the ascent of television, has been bringing all things ‘Minnesota’ to the rest of the planet for over 33 years.
“Intelligence is like a four-wheel drive. It allows you to get stuck in more remote places.”
- Garrison Keillor (1942- )
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Bill Dodds is a writer who has contributed to Catholic magazines throughout the United States and Canada.
“Labor Day is a glorious holiday because your child will be going back to school the next day. It would have been called Independence Day, but that name was already taken.”
- Bill Dodds
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Truman Capote, an American author, wrote literary classics such as ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ and ‘In Cold Blood’.
“Young men think old men are fools; but old men know young men are fools.”
- Truman Capote (1924-1984)
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Cowboy, comedian, and social commentator, Will Rogers was of Cherokee descent. He quipped that his ancestors did not come over on the Mayflower, but that they ‘met the boat’.
“You know horses are smarter than people. You never heard of a horse going broke betting on people.”
- Will Rogers (1829-1935)
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Samuel Goldwyn was a co-founder of the movie studios that became Paramount Pictures and of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer (the roaring lion at the beginning of the show). Discord with partners caused him to leave both companies. Eventually he founded the Samuel Goldwyn Studio on his own. As an immigrant, his unique use of English sometimes led to the quirky ways he phrased things, a few of which we have for you here…
“True, I’ve been a long time making up my mind, but now I’m giving you a definite answer. I won’t say yes, and I won’t say no - but I’m giving you a definite maybe.”
"The harder I work, the luckier I get."
“ I don’t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job.”
- Samuel Goldwyn (1882-1974)
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“Two quotes from Albert Einstein, who was constantly stopped on the street to explain his theory of relativity. Einstein would respond by saying, ‘Pardon me, so sorry. Always I am being mistaken for Professor Einstein’.”
“The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.”
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
“You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I’ve only ever had one.”
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
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A French poet, novelist and filmmaker, Jean Cocteau was a proponent of Surrealism. His friends and associates include Marcel Proust, Andre’ Gide and Pablo Picasso. He struggled with opium addiction throughout much of his life.
“We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don’t like?”
- Jean Cocteau (1889-1963)
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From humorist, playwright, novelist and poet Oscar Wilde, who wasn’t known as a health enthusiast…
“To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable.”
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
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Bill Vaughan, the Kansas City Star’s syndicated columnist for 31 years, wrote this sometime prior to 1977 (over 30 years ago). And incredibly and unfortunately, it still is true!
Man is the animal that intends to shoot himself out into interplanetary space, after having given up on the problem of an efficient way to get himself five miles to work and back each day.
- Bill Vaughan (1915 –1977)
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"In 2001, Paula Poundstone, the standup comedian and political commentator, had some personal dificulties involving alchohol abuse, including an arrest and conviction. She went through treatment and improved her life, clearly placing her far ahead of so many others in the current popularity trend for celebrities to have some outragious behavior followed by rehab.
“The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, its just sort of a tired feeling.”
- Paula Poundstone (1959- )
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Woody Allen - Allen is his given first name and Woody after the great jazz clarinetist, Woody Herman – had the good fortune to be raised in New York City by loving Jewish parents who were proactive in their parenting approach. Allen honors them by sharing two examples from his life of their leadership and parental wisdom:
“When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.”
His parents felt it was important to expose him to other faiths so in summers he was sent to inter-faith summer camps, where he “was savagely beaten by children of all races and creeds.”
- Woody Allen (1935- ) Allen Stewart Königsberg
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